There is probably nothing that bothers me more then when people don't have the common courtesy to respond, this mostly applies to R.S.V.P.'s but also to phone calls and emails. (when a response is obvious or necessary - a simple yes, no or thanks is often sufficient) I planned my daughter's birthday party and only got a few replies to let me know their girls would be at the party. I wasn't planning a huge party and didn't absolutely needed to know how many girls would be attending but it's usually just good manners. Here is the actual meaning of the term:
The term R.S.V.P. comes from the French expression "répondez s'il vous plaît", meaning "please respond". If R.S.V.P. is written on an invitation it means the invited guest must tell the host whether or not they plan to attend the party. It does not mean to respond only if you're coming, and it does not mean respond only if you're not coming (the expression "regrets only" is reserved for that instance). It means the host needs a definite head count for the planned event, and needs it by the date specified on the invitation.
It happens every year and I still expect different. Why do some parents choose not to respond? This year I actually got a few more than usual, which was a nice surprise, but it still bothers me. One mom actually called and told me her daughter was coming but then didn't show up and didn't call to let me know?! (okay, I have to rescind this sassiness because when I went to have lunch with my daughter, the little girl who was supposed to come to the party apologized for not coming because her grandparents were in town. Okay, you're in 1st grade and you apologized to your friend's mom? You are granted a pass) I guess it bothers me because I hold everyone else to the high standard that I hold myself but at the same time.... they have no idea. Which I know on the one hand it's not fair to them but on the other hand it's common courtesy to let a party host know if you're going to be there or not. Like the Cranky Princess wrote: you can't dictate manners.
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